Published September 14, 2022 by Fan_Girl_Noha

Drip drip drip…
In a dreary room with white walls, a man opened his eyes in confusion. He blinked twice before he realized he was lying on the floor. The cold surface sent chills to his bones and he could feel a slight backache developing. He sat up and focused his eyes on the walls. The wall in front of him was completely white. Adam had never seen walls this white before. Usually, the color would fade or the wall would become dirty after some time. He assumed this wall was newly painted, but couldn’t smell the raw paint. How strange! He decided to stop thinking about such nonsensical things and focus on his whereabouts. After all, he was sure that this wasn’t his room. What was concerning though was the fact that he didn’t remember how he ended up here, OR anything before that. He knew who he was, who his parents, family and friends were; the fact that he had a very average 9 to 5 job at an advertising company. And yet, for the love of God, he couldn’t remember what had happened before he woke up in this god-forsaken room. Adam decided to keep the confusing issues aside for now and started looking around again.

As he stood up, he noticed the multicolored patterns on the mosaic floor. The embedded stones created a pattern that seemed hypnotic and nostalgic at the same time. Adam’s eyes panned through the room to find an exit. That’s when he started to sweat with panic.
Why doesn’t this room have any doors?
Adam’s breathing hitched and he could feel his heartbeat rising. He was claustrophobic. The very thought of being stuck in a room without any exits made him feel like he was in a coffin. After whizzing for a few minutes, he decided to calm down a bit. He couldn’t find his inhaler in the side pocket of his favorite blue jacket, where it usually rested; well, at least it had been habitually kept there since Adam was 17. He was groping about his body in search of the white silhouette of the inhaler when he heard a sound that made his hopes return.
Drip drip drip drip…
Adam frantically looked around the room again but couldn’t find any signs of water dripping.
Could it be coming from outside?
He tried to listen more carefully as he put his left ear on the wall beside him.
Nope, the sound’s not coming from this side. I guess I should keep walking along the walls.
As he started walking along the wall he felt puzzled. The room clearly looked square when he first surveyed it. Its area certainly didn’t look more than 10×10 feet. And now that he kept walking, he couldn’t find an end to this wall, as if it could stretch till the end of the world.
Adam started to panic again.
I’m clearly not in my room and everything in this room feels weird. Maybe I’m just dreaming?
That was a good possibility since he couldn’t smell anything around him. He’d heard that you can’t smell anything in a dream. He pinched his left arm to determine his guesses.
Ouch! That felt pretty real! 
His left forearm turned red from the pinch.
So, this is probably not a dream…he thought…but, is it really possible to know if I’m dreaming by pinching? Ugh! No! No! No! Focus, Adam, focus! You need to focus on getting out of this place first. You can just google about pinching and dreaming later on.
As soon as he thought of googling, Adam remembered his cellphone.
He searched through the flannel pajamas he was wearing. His pajamas were custom made and the pants had multiple pockets in it.
He couldn’t find his phone in his pajama pockets but looking around the room again, he saw his phone lying on the floor near his feet.
What the ****!! How did it get here? Was it here from the beginning? 
Adam was freaked out. He thought he wasn’t dreaming but now he was wondering whether he’d become delusional. It’s true that he’d smoked weed once in a while with his friends but he’d never hallucinated because of that.
He picked up the familiar Samsung phone with trembling hands and checked the screen. He was one of the weird ones who still kept his own photograph on the lock screen. He’d been called a narcissistic prick because of it but he always felt that it helped him identify his phone pretty easily.
The locked screen showed a picture of him,but he wasn’t alone; it was him and Evelyn. He used to call her Eve. It gave him a sense of security, predestination even; as if Adam and Evelyn were like the ancestors of all humans-created solely for each other; “We’re destined partners” he would joke and Evelyn used to laugh at this. “I know we’re still high school students, but you’re too naive for your own good, Adam. In real life, there’s nothing called forever.” Evelyn would tell him with a bitter smile. He never understood why she had such bitterness when she was only 17 at that time. She didn’t have a bad life. Her parents were a loving couple. Her father, Mr. Avory Lamarque, was a local shopkeeper. He ran a general store. Her mother, Julian, helped out Mr. Lamarque at the store and worked at her small boutique. Sure, they weren’t the richest people around, but Evelyn never saw poverty in her life. She was their only child and was loved by most of the people around her. Or at least, that’s what Adam thought until that fateful summer day in 2015 when they found Evelyn’s dismembered body at the docks. The killer was a stranger, someone who had a sudden urge to kill Evelyn after he saw her blonde hair. He was a serial killer. He’d allegedly killed 17 more women before Evelyn and gotten away with it. For him, Evelyn was just a prey. It didn’t matter that she was about to graduate from high school in a few months, nor that she was the only child of her parents. Nothing mattered. It never does.

Adam stared at the brightly lit screen with dead eyes before coming back to his senses. “This is my phone”, he said aloud to himself. Let’s try making a call.

He entered the password to unlock the phone but was met with another lock screen asking for his fingerprint.

Huh? Where did this come from? He only set up a password lock on his phone. He was confused and annoyed. This was probably Philip’s work.

“That d*mned brat!” Adam cursed as he put his thumb on the screen. However,  he didn’t see the screen unlock. Rather he felt a prick on his thumb and removed it instantly.

“F**K!” Adam cursed as he found his finger had a small prick on it and a little blood had been smothered on the screen. He sucked on the wound on instinct but it just increased the pain. He wanted to wipe the screen but the blood on it was gone, striking Adam dumb for a few minutes. He immediately looked at his thumb and found no injury on it.

What the actual f**k is going on here? Am I really hallucinating?  Maybe I drank too much last night.

While Adam pondered over his habit of drinking too much, he failed to notice the notification on the screen of the phone.

Subject Acquired…

Archiving DNA sample of Adam Sandburg…

DNA sample Archived…

Matching DNA… 

Match found with *&$#/*(*//#

Initiating transfer process…0%…7%…17%…23%….39%…54%….68%...

As the percentage increased Adam noticed the changes in the screen.

“Transfer?!!? Wait, if data can be transferred then the phone must have been connected to Bluetooth or Wi-fi.”

He checked the phone but there was no signal. No Bluetooth or Wi-fi icon could be seen either. All he could see was the transfer process getting completed…79%….84%…98%…

Did my phone freeze up? I hope this isn’t some kind of virus.

As he worried about his phone being hacked the transfer process was finally completed.

…100%…Transfer complete.

Simulation activating in 10…9…8…7………3…2…1…Activated. 

Welcome to the GAME! You will be transferred to the first stage in 10 seconds…9…8…7…

Whoa! Whoa! What game! What the hell! I don’t want to start a game. Stop showing me this stupid screen and let me make some calls already. Stupid phone!

Adam shouted as he struggled to get rid of the countdown.


Once the countdown was completed, Adam felt an overwhelming sense of vertigo. The next moment his body and the phone dropped together on the floor. While Adam was unconscious he couldn’t see the screen project these strange words:

Subject: Adam Sandburg

Phase: 1

Level 1 

Skills: N/A

Items: Fruit of Knowledge (Level 100; currently unusable)

*************** (Level ????, *****)

Gifts: N/A

Title: The Ancient Father

To be continued….



Published July 15, 2020 by Fan_Girl_Noha

Dreams are fickle…you see a dream and it feels very real – as if you can hear, touch, smell or even taste it. And yet you wake up, try to remember the details frantically, only to realize that the harder you try to catch them, the easier they slip away from your fingers. With each passing moment, most of the details start blurring. You’re left with nothing but bitter reminiscence of what you felt…a pounding heart, loneliness, fear, anxiety, maybe even the putrid smell of ardent desire which doesn’t go away…lingering in your mind like a throbbing tumor…eating you away little by little…turning neurotic…rotting away…tearing you apart from the inside…gnawing at any semblance of sanity that you hold. You shiver and get goosebumps at a foreign sense of chill spreading through your limbs, but nothing makes it go away -not warm hugs, nor hot coffee, neither the burning sun. It’s cold, very cold.

Habits of a millennial 1

Published June 17, 2020 by Fan_Girl_Noha

I have a very bad habit – whenever I face a situation that is troubling or somehow makes me uncomfortable,  I tend to escape from it. Sometimes the escape is physical: I stay outside home for longer periods; other times the escape is mental: I stay in the house, in my room but create a different world in my mind- one that is full of fantasy and imagination; one that makes me feel different;  one that gives me happiness.  This happens when I read light novels or indulge myself in other forms of entertainment. It makes me feel like I have a world of my own. People may call millennials lazy, but I feel that we’re merely different from our previous generations. They had the chance to use the nature around them as a means of escape. We don’t have that chance, unfortunately. When you’re stuck amidst the concrete and pollutants of big cities, it’s not possible to seek refuge in nature. The next best thing would’ve been sports, but that’s rarely possible as playgrounds are constantly being destroyed to meet with the demands of the growing population. Some say books are another way of escape but carrying books everywhere is impossible. More importantly, will you always have the right book with you? Not likely. So, people of my generation chose the next best thing: smartphones and ebooks…. (TBC)

Published July 28, 2018 by Fan_Girl_Noha

Sometimes the moments that you expected to cherish as happy ones turn into the loneliest. Here I was, hoping and expecting a happy birthday. And here I am, feeling like shit for being born. I wonder if the world would be better without me. Maybe it will be. Maybe it won’t. I guess I can be over-sensitive about different issues.

Reaching the Limit

Published March 16, 2018 by Fan_Girl_Noha

I think I’ve reached my limit already. Life has somehow become unbearable. I always knew that I was a weakling, but I never thought that I was THIS weak. I’m completely vulnerable and fragile mentally. Even small setbacks make me feel like I’ll topple over the edge. It’s suffocating. I’m not sure why and for what I’m living. I have no goals, no passion. Any sort of passion I had before has been quashed as time went by. It’s not that I don’t have ambitions. It’s just that I feel too lazy to work for those ambitions.  What happens when you can’t find your raison d’être? Does that mean you’re already dead inside?


Published March 9, 2017 by Fan_Girl_Noha

From the moment human beings start using their intellect, they have to go through the excruciating process of making choices. It’s quite strange: intellect is supposed to give you the rationale for making the right decisions, but at one point you realize that intelligence actually makes decision-making more difficult. If you go with your gut-feeling, you usually end up choosing something pretty easily. Intelligence just makes you weigh every option for multiple times. And that’s not even the end! Because of having reason and intellect,  you mull over the choices you had made in the past and you are never happy! Should I have chosen the red shirt rather than the green one? Was it right to move away from my old home? Was it the right decision to eat that extra slice of pizza? 😜😜 Life is a never ending barrage of choices that you could or already have screwed up. Only the degree of the screw-up differs!

Stuck in a Limbo

Published November 27, 2016 by Fan_Girl_Noha

I’ve heard the expression “history repeats itself” for a million times. I know that some things might get repeated in life but that doesn’t mean I can accept it gratefully. Being stuck in a never-ending limbo of depression, lethargy and passiveness are suffocating me. I’m really stuck in a limbo- one that won’t allow me to do anything productive. As I lay around in bed for hours, doing nothing remotely useful, I contemplate over the most depressing issues. I can never figure out the reason for this never ending disease, this shadow-like clingy ailment that is DEPRESSION. It’s not like I’m leading an unhappy life. It’s just that I don’t find the joy in living anymore. I wonder if everyone facing depression goes through the same thing? I feel insane at times. It’s like I’m stuck inside the script of Waiting for Godot…always waiting for some nonexistent thing to come and drop buckets of motivation on me. Waiting without a sense of time or place, completely oblivious to the rest of the world. How long can I live like this? Maybe I can’t live in this world anymore…

Confusions and Jealousy

Published November 20, 2016 by Fan_Girl_Noha

It’s a weird feeling to realize that the burning sensation inside your chest is actually jealousy. (Honestly, I thought I was simply having a bad acidic reaction.) It becomes even more confusing when you don’t know why you’re feeling jealous. Love? Infatuation? Loneliness? Who knows? Jealousy, however, does have its perks. After your fit of rage at a completely non-existent thing is over, your mind becomes more lucid; your thoughts more collected. It made me realize today, that I have much bigger hurdles to overcome in the future. It also made me realize, that I might have to lead a very lonely life from now on. I realized that I’m merely a child; one that imitates others and gets influenced by others very easily. Just give me candy(a metaphoric one of course), and I’ll start to like you. No. Maybe I’m just extremely shortsighted. It’s ironic how lucidity can give birth to more confusion. I guess, I  was never lucid in the first place.



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